10 Online Safety Rules Every Parent Should Teach Their Digital Tween

Introduction

Raising a digital tween can feel like an adventure, and with all the apps, games, and social networks they explore, online safety is a crucial part of the journey. Kids aged 9-12 are becoming tech-savvy, but they still need guidance to safely navigate the online world. As a parent, it’s important to establish some clear rules to help protect them while still allowing them to enjoy the benefits of being online.

Here are 10 online safety rules every parent should teach their digital tween:

2. Use Strong Passwords
A strong password is like a key to their digital world. Encourage your tween to use unique and strong passwords—something more secure than “password123.” Make it fun by teaching them to create a phrase or sentence that’s easy for them to remember but hard for others to guess.

3. Think Before You Post
Once something is posted online, it’s out there for good. Help your tween understand that what they share online, whether it’s a picture or a comment, can be seen by more people than they realize. A good rule of thumb is: if they wouldn’t say it in person, don’t post it online!

4. Be Cautious with Strangers Online
Much like in the real world, not everyone online is who they say they are. Explain the importance of not accepting friend requests or engaging in conversations with strangers. Even in games or social apps, it’s better to stick to people they know in real life.

5. Report Anything That Feels Uncomfortable
Let your tween know they should come to you or another trusted adult if they ever encounter something online that makes them feel uneasy, whether it’s a message, a comment, or an image. Make sure they understand that they won’t get in trouble for speaking up!

6. Set Screen Time Boundaries
It’s easy for tweens to get lost in the world of videos, social media, or gaming. Set clear limits on how much time they can spend online each day. Balance is key—encourage activities offline, like sports, hobbies, or just spending time with family.

7. Double-Check App Permissions
Before downloading any apps, teach your tween to always ask for your permission. Many apps request access to their contacts, location, or camera, which may not always be necessary or safe. Together, you can decide which apps are safe and appropriate.

8. Avoid Clicking on Strange Links
Phishing scams or malware often come disguised as exciting links or pop-ups. Teach your tween to never click on links from people they don’t know or on strange ads that pop up while browsing. It’s always better to ask before clicking!

9. Use Privacy Settings on Social Media
If your tween is starting to explore social media, it’s essential to set their accounts to private. Walk them through the privacy settings of their favorite platforms to ensure only approved friends can see what they post.

10. Lead by Example
Children often mimic their parents’ behavior. Be a role model by practicing good online habits yourself. Show them how you navigate the web safely, manage your screen time, and respect others online. This will make it easier for them to follow the rules you set!

How can I teach my tween to recognize online predators?

Teaching your tween to recognize online predators is an essential part of keeping them safe in the digital world. Here’s how you can approach this:

1. Educate Them About Online Dangers

Explain the concept of online predators in simple, non-frightening language. Let them know that some people pretend to be someone they’re not to harm others.
Emphasize anonymity online: Explain how easy it is for someone to lie about their identity, age, or intentions online..

2. Teach Them to Protect Personal Information

No sharing of personal info: Make sure they know never to share personal information (full name, address, school, phone number) with anyone online, even if they feel they “know” the person.
Avoid posting revealing details about their daily routine, whereabouts, or future plans on social media.

3. Recognize Red Flags

Unusual flattery or compliments: If someone online excessively compliments them or makes them feel “special,” it might be a sign of grooming.
Pressure for secrets: Predators often ask kids to keep their interactions a secret. Tell your tween that keeping secrets about online activities is a red flag.
Requests to move conversations to private platforms or chat apps.
Requests for personal photos or inappropriate content: Emphasize that no one, not even friends, should be asking for private or inappropriate pictures.

4. Encourage Open Communication

Create a safe space where they feel comfortable sharing concerns about people they interact with online.
Discuss tricky situations: Use real-life scenarios to help them think about what they would do if someone they met online asked them for personal information or wanted to meet in person.
Reassure them they won’t be punished for coming to you with concerns or mistakes they may have made online.

5. Set Boundaries and Monitor Usage

Use parental controls: Set limits on the apps and websites they can use.
Monitor their friends lists: Know who your child is interacting with and periodically review their friends and followers on social platforms.
Encourage privacy settings: Teach your tween to set their social media profiles to private, only accepting friend requests from people they know in real life.

6. Teach Digital Empathy and Boundaries

Teach your child to trust their instincts. If someone makes them feel uncomfortable, it’s okay to block or report them.
Respectful digital behavior: Let them know it’s not okay to pressure others or be pressured by anyone online.

7. Be Involved

Stay up to date on the apps and platforms your child uses. Predators often target kids on gaming platforms or social media sites popular among tweens.
Check in regularly: Regular conversations about their online activity can help you detect any concerning behavior early.

8. Teach Them How to Respond

Block and report: Show them how to block and report inappropriate users or behavior on every platform they use.
No meeting in person: Make sure they understand never to agree to meet someone they’ve met online without your permission.

By combining education, open communication, and monitoring, you can empower your tween to recognize online predators and protect themselves while navigating the digital world.

What apps are safest for children to use?

When choosing safe apps for children, especially tweens, it’s important to look for apps with strong privacy settings, good content moderation, and parental control options. Here are some child-safe apps that prioritize security and provide age-appropriate content:

1. Messenger Kids (by Facebook)

Age: 6-12
Why it’s safe: Parents control the contact list, and there are no ads or in-app purchases. Kids can only chat with friends and family approved by the parents.
Safety features: Parents have access to all conversations, and kids can’t delete messages. The app also includes blocking and reporting features.

2. YouTube Kids

Age: 3-12
Why it’s safe: This is a kid-friendly version of YouTube with curated content that is age-appropriate. Parents can set viewing limits and restrict search features.
Safety features: You can filter content by age, and the app offers a strict parental control mode that restricts access to inappropriate content.

3. Google Family Link

Age: All ages (depending on use)
Why it’s safe: While not a single app, this is a parental control tool that allows you to manage the apps your child can download and set screen time limits.
Safety features: Parents can monitor their child’s online activity, set restrictions, and track device location.

4. Kidzania

Age: 4-12
Why it’s safe: This app offers interactive learning experiences designed for children to explore careers and real-world scenarios through games.
Safety features: The platform does not involve chatting with strangers, and content is educational and appropriate for children.

5. PBS Kids Games

Age: 4-8
Why it’s safe: Developed by PBS, this app offers educational games and activities featuring popular characters from PBS Kids TV shows.
Safety features: No ads, in-app purchases, or access to inappropriate content. The app is educational and focuses on safe, fun content.

6. ABCmouse

Age: 2-8
Why it’s safe: ABCmouse is an award-winning early learning app that focuses on educational activities. It’s ad-free and requires a subscription, keeping kids away from third-party content.
Safety features: No external links or interactions with strangers. Parents can track progress and monitor usage.

7. Tynker

Age: 7+
Why it’s safe: Tynker is an app designed to teach kids programming through fun and interactive activities. The content is safe and educational.
Safety features: There is no social interaction with strangers, and parents can track progress.

8. Duolingo Kids

Age: 4-12
Why it’s safe: A language-learning app with simple, kid-friendly lessons that teach languages in a safe and fun way.
Safety features: No chat functions, and content is educational. It’s designed to be child-friendly with no ads or inappropriate content.

9. Sago Mini World

Age: 2-5
Why it’s safe: This is a creative play app for young kids with a focus on learning and exploration.
Safety features: No ads or in-app purchases, and all content is designed specifically for young children.

10. Roblox (With Parental Controls)

Age: 10+
Why it’s safe: While Roblox has had some safety concerns in the past, with parental controls enabled, it can be a safe platform. Parents can restrict chat features, block inappropriate games, and monitor activity.
Safety features: Set an age-appropriate content filter, disable chat, and review what games your child plays. There’s also a reporting feature for inappropriate content.

11. Nick Jr.

Age: 2-7
Why it’s safe: This app features games, videos, and activities based on Nickelodeon Jr. shows.
Safety features: It’s ad-free and doesn’t require any social interaction. All content is designed specifically for young children.

12. Minecraft (With Settings Adjusted)

Age: 7+
Why it’s safe: Minecraft is a creative game that allows kids to build and explore virtual worlds. It can be played offline or in multiplayer mode (with settings adjusted for safety).
Safety features: In multiplayer mode, parents can limit interactions, restrict access to certain servers, or choose single-player modes for offline play.

13. Khan Academy Kids

Age: 2-8
Why it’s safe: An educational app that teaches kids reading, math, problem-solving, and more through fun games and interactive activities.
Safety features: No ads or in-app purchases, and the app is 100% free. Content is created by educators and tailored to children.

14. Marble Kids Videos

Age: 3-12
Why it’s safe: This app provides kid-friendly videos with no ads and content tailored to a young audience.
Safety features: All content is filtered, and there is no interaction with other users.

15. ReadingIQ

Age: 2-12
Why it’s safe: This is an educational app designed to improve reading skills. It offers a library of books categorized by reading level.
Safety features: No external links or chat functions, and parents can track progress.

General Tips for Safe App Use:

Use Parental Control Settings: Almost all major operating systems and devices allow parental controls. Make sure to set age restrictions, limit screen time, and block unsafe apps.
Check Ratings and Reviews: Always look at user reviews and age recommendations before allowing your child to use an app.
Stay Engaged: Be involved in your child’s digital life. Ask them about the apps they use and have conversations about online safety.

By combining safe app choices with regular monitoring and discussions about online behavior, you can create a safer digital environment for your tween.

Conclusion

By teaching your tween these simple online safety rules, you’ll empower them to enjoy the digital world responsibly and confidently. The internet is a great place for learning and creativity, and with your guidance, your digital tween can have fun while staying safe!

References

Here are some sources that provide useful information about online safety for tweens:

Common Sense Media – This website offers extensive resources and advice on internet safety for kids and tweens, including how to manage social media use and screen time.
- Website: commonsensemedia.org
Connect Safely – A nonprofit organization dedicated to educating parents, teens, and children on staying safe online, with plenty of guides on privacy and safety settings for apps and social platforms.
- Website: connectsafely.org
National Online Safety – Provides information and courses for parents and educators on how to support children’s online behavior, covering topics like online privacy, social networks, and digital safety.
- Website: nationalonlinesafety.com
Stay Safe Online – From the National Cyber Security Alliance, this site offers tools and resources for parents to help their children stay safe in the digital world.
- Website: staysafeonline.org
Kids Health from Nemours – Offers advice to parents about internet safety and how to talk to children about online behavior, privacy, and the potential risks.
- Website: kidshealth.org